Folly!

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Simply put, I don’t.

Five years?

Nope. I’ll have none of it.

One year…

I got nothing.

Tomorrow – I see myself practicing my bass in the morning and logging in for work afterward. That’s the extent of it. Even that may not happen, so I don’t put much stock into anything unless it’s happening right now, like writing this post. 😉

Technically, at my age, ten years from now, I should be retired. I should be writing all about my big plans. No work, all that free time!

Yay!

Truth of the matter is, it may not happen. Economic collapse or a really bad financial decision on my part could lay waste to my nest egg (have you ever seen the show American Greed?). I flat out may not live that long.

My brother talked about what he was going to do when he retired. Sadly, that day never came. He died of myelofibrosis at the age of 61. All his plans, dust in the wind. He followed a similar path my dad took. Dad passed at the age of 64, a mere 13 months after he retired.

I’m not waiting for retirement. Whatever I can do, I will do now.

Is this my way of telling people goals are usless?

Not at all.

I don’t see myself retired in ten years, but I dutifully contribute to my 401k every pay period. I plan for things, but I don’t expect things. I’m only looking at the next place I’m putting my foot. Is it soft grass or a big stinky pile of doo-doo? My theory is that if I stay in the soft grass, I’ll head towards my goal.

Then, you also have to examine the reason behind your goal. I have heard many of my friends and family say, “I’ll be happy when (fill in the goal)” The question I love to ask is, “Are you not happy now?” If you aren’t, why?

I see many people putting off their happiness.  It’s always waiting on something to happen – retirement, the next vacation, Christmas, the divorce, the weight loss, the next new relationship with Ms. or Mr. Right. The list can go on and on. There is always something. 

The funny thing is, once a goal is achieved, there’s no switch to flip that turns on your happiness. When I started losing weight twenty years ago, I thought I would “be happy.” Maybe the guys would stop ignoring me. You know what, many of them did. Then I realized that they didn’t like me for being me.

None of the extra attention made me happy. In fact, I was uncomfortable and really not used to it. The whole idea that I would enjoy it was a serious delusion.

So I concentrated on the parts of weight loss that really had value – like feeling better, being more active,  buying clothes at a “regular” store, sitting comfortably in an airline seat or a booth at a restaurant. It still wasn’t a guarantee of happiness, but I can at least feel some satisfaction that there is one less awkward thing to deal with.

If I’m going to wrap all this up with a pretty bow, I’ll say that it’s best not to look too far ahead. When you do, don’t put a shimmery gold aura around it like it is a magical time and place.

If you are looking for that, look no further than what is in front of you now. 

In my case, it’s this daffodil. 😊